The Stink-off

Video of my daughter performing her own dog breath contest with her stuffed animals, inspired by mommy's novel Dog Breath.

 

 

 

Check out Dog Breath at:

https://sites.google.com/site/finedogbreath

Query Me, Maybe

Who likes parodies? I do. I made up this one for a writing agent to be sung to the tune of Call Me, Maybe.

Another ms in the trash

Damn straight, hope it turns to ash

Another click, as it burns

And now you’re on my screen

 

I’d trade my soul for that book

Pennies and dimes for a look

I wasn’t expecting this

But now you’ve caught my eye

Your pitch was quirky

Funny plot, talent was showing

Hot hunk, face was glowing

Where is this story going?

 

Hey, I just read it, and this is crazy

But here’s my email, query me maybe

It’s hard to think right, with this baby

But here’s my email, query me maybe

 

(Repeat chorus)

 

You took your time to reply

I took no time eating pie

It finally came with a sigh, but still it’s got to be read

I giggle and chuckle and snort

You’ve I’ve decided to court

I didn’t know I would find it, but it’ll be a best seller

 

(Chorus)

Born to Smell Dog Breath?

First photo for Dog Breath photo contest came into my mailbox today.

 

Is it possible that this was Tom Tidy, AKA Dog Breath, when he was a newborn? Did he know he had that special acute sniffer as a wee babe? I dunno, but it sure is cute.

Photo submitter: Suzanne Chapple
Pictured: Unknown

These pictures for the contest don't have to be originals. Let's just keep them coming!

Scroll down posts for further contest details.
 

Christmas Presents for the Writer in Your Life

Seven presents every writer can appreciate, found at Office Max.

1.       Business Cards

Get 250 full color cards for under $25 in store with downloadable coupon from their website.

 

2.       Printer

Good printers range from $150 to $300. I’d suggest one which doesn’t drain the color ink cartridge when you print in strictly black-and-white. (Not Kodak printers). Also, look for one where the reviews say fast printing. Most writers print their “ms” at the last minute as they are running out the door to their critique circles. No one wants to wait 30 minutes for printing to finish. And you should take note that a wireless printer still needs to be hooked up directly to your computer unless you have WiFi in your home.

My suggestion: The Brother MFC7860DW Compact Laser All-in-One with Wireless Networking and Duplex $200.00, get a $30 discount if you order online

 

 

3.       Computer

I have a Toshiba Netbook. It is light, silvery, and sleek. It fits in my purse and it has wifi. However, if you are looking for something for a little bigger and something that has a CD drive, I suggest this Toshiba Satellite. $300

4.       Planner

Call me old fashion and blame it on the fact that I do not have an iphone.  But I love planners. Planners, that like my computer, can fit in my purse.

 

Love the contemporary design of this Franklin Covey Planner. $32.50 with store coupon.

 

5.       Stapler

$4.00 for a sleek stapler. You have to keep those submissions in order!

 

6.       Adobe Dreamwear Software $300

It’s Downloadable Even!

 

I realize there are free website builders, and yes, I use them. But, it I had the money…this software would be ideal for a writer to create an incredible, professional looking webpage.

 

7. Paper

I like the multi-use copy paper, personally.

 

Worst Dog Breath Contest

 

Jolene Fine, author of the book, Dog Breath, is hosting a promotional photo contest for the funniest picture of a person sniffing their dog’s breath.

 

Email your picture to: Jolenefine@yahoo.com, along with your name, your dog’s name, and the breed of your pet. Entries will be taken until the end of January 2014.

 

There is no fee to enter. All appropriate entries will be posted on the author’s website: https://sites.google.com/site/finedogbreath. Then, between February 1^st through February 14^th, post your vote. The winner of the photo contest will be featured on the author’s blog and receive a free Kindle-edition and audio version of her book, Dog Breath.

 

Dog Breath is expected to be released in kindle format on amazon.com January 31^st, 2014. The audio version is expected to release before April of 2014.

 

Go to author’s blog at: http://jolenefine.blogspot.com for more information.

Money in Dog Breath

Did you know that American consumers pay billions each year on freshening their pet’s breath?

 

Yes, there is big money in dog breath research, something my character Tom Tidy knows from working at Chomp Dog Food for the last fifteen years. He’ll give you a firsthand tour of his quirky job in the soon to be released novel, Dog Breath, by Jolene Fine.

Write What You Know

Fellow novelist, Jeff Bauer, author of Cavern Kings and Wakulla Bones, is a perfect example of a person writing what they know. His years of working as a scuba instructor, specializing in underwater cave diving, led him to the creation of his mystery novels. My favorite thing about his writing is that when his character is swimming through the reefs, it feels so authentic that I feel like I am scuba diving alongside him.

 

One of the things that attracted me to his book, was his cover. He tells us a little about how and why he choose his cover artist. (Same one I went with.)

 

“I chose Elizabeth (of Babski Creative Solutions) for my cover art for several factors:

* I knew her from Outcasts (a diverse and talented group of writers that have a writing critique group is linked to the Tallahassee Writing Association) and have built a level of trust with her. After talking to her and looking at her portfolio, I knew that she’d be able to do the work.

*Her price was competitive with other book cover services, like Create Space.

 

*I much prefer having a person I can physically talk to about the ideas for the cover and, in this case, even show them physical props (the line arrow and line) rather than hoping that an email or phone discussion gets the correct point across.

 

*Being an Outcast, she has read some of my work and therefore has an advantage in being able to help design a cover.

 

*I found out after hiring her that she was very easy to work with and didn't mind tweaking designs to get the results I wanted.

 

*Elizabeth clearly has experience with all of the minutiae of designing covers (the file format, front & back, spine, etc., etc., etc.) that I do not have. For the record, to date the cover art has been the most expensive part of publishing that book (but well worth it).

 

*As far as sales and the cover, it's too early to tell.  I think the cover is much, much, much better than the one I did for my first book (using the free canned templates in CreateSpace) and have gotten much more favorable comments about it.”

 

Thanks Jeff!

 

Well, I’m stirring in my seat and can’t wait to see my first peeks of my cover for the soon to be released southern comedy, Dog Breath by Jolene Fine.